ABIOLA ABRAMS IN THE MEDIA
Hey Rockstars,
I just wanted to take a brief station break to say THANK YOU to a few wonderful writers, publications, sites and content producers for profiling me last week. Please support them by visiting their sites. You’re guaranteed to find something enjoyable.
This is Media Worth Watching:
- Thanks to Wayne Sutton for including me in his powerful series 28 Days of Diversity;
- Thanks to Time Out New York for shouting out Abiola’s Kiss & Tell Live Revue;
- Thanks to Nando Rodriguez for showing love in his Power of Twitter article;
- Thanks to the NYC Sex Blogger’s Calendar where I’m Ms. February;
- Thanks to Shei Funmi for the blog interview;
- Thanks to Big Ced of blackplanet for including us as a Spotlight Viewer Profile.
Condoms Can Make Sex Better? YES! Safe Sex Initiative
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| A condom dress by Adriana Bertini is at the center of Trojan’s Museum of Sex Rubbers exhibit in NYC. Photo courtesy of Adriana Bertini. Please visit her site. |
Trojan sponsors the “Rubbers” condom exhibit at the Museum of Sex.
Today’s Kiss and Tell Report.
I find myself at the most deliciously scandalous places. Last night I attended a history of the condom event at the Museum of Sex in Manhattan. The exhibit is called Rubbers: The Life, History and Struggle of the Condom and featured one of Adriana Bertini’s gorgeous cocktail dresses made from 1200 condoms.
I’ve been to the Museum of Sex, nicknamed MOSEX, a couple of times before; once to read my essay “Slut” on tour for the book Dirty Words: A Literary Encyclopedia of Sex and another time with my Afrodite Superstar erotica film executive producer Candida Royalle.
The Rubbers Exhibit and last night’s soiree were sponsored by Trojan Condoms. You know our friends at Trojan, right? The thoughtful people who brought us a sweet little thing called the Trojan Vibrating Ring? Uh-huh. They also created Trojan Her Pleasure Condoms and Vibrating Touch Fingertip Massager, and quite skillfully at that. They also make America’s best selling condom Ecstasy. We heart Trojan and obviously so do you.
Trojan shared exciting news about Fire and Ice, their newest innovation. Trojan’s Fire and Ice is first condom “with warming AND tingling sensations” inside and outside of the condom “giving both sides of the pleasure spectrum.” The good people at Trojan told us that their objective is to make condom sex feel even better than non-condom sex. Well alrighty then! Each guest left MOSEX with a box of Trojan Fire and Ice condoms to test at home.
You’ll see my full Trojan Museum of Sex adventure on an upcoming episode of Kiss and Tell TV where we talk about how to make your partner wear a condom then how to put a condom on properly.
Find Trojan Fire and Ice and all of their other delights in any drugstore. The Rubbers condom exhibit of art, history and politics is at The Museum of Sex, located at 233 5th Avenue in New York City; (212) 689-6337.
Use condoms every time, Rock Stars, to prevent the spread of sexually transmitted diseases. We don’t care what brand you use, just use a condom. And if that condom can make you have increased sensations like Trojan claims to, all the better!
YouTube Video: Trojan’s Let’s Ride Out the Hard Times Together Commercial
Dating Diary: Single Women’s Adventures with Twanna & Abiola (VIDEO)
Single Women, Single Men, Celebrate the Single Life, video below.
Watch this two part sexy and single escapade: Where Are the Good Men? aka How to Meet Men.
Single Women in NYC Adventure, PART 1 of 2
Single Women in NYC Adventure, PART 2 of 2
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Today’s Kiss and Tell Report.
Whoo Hoo!
It’s Celebrate Being Single Week; at least so says my editor. There’s apparently also a more politically focused National Unmarried and Single Americans Week in September. Why not? We’ve got Bosses Day, The Sweetest Day and everything else. Why not celebrate deliberate singlehood? Where’s my Single Woman’s greeting card? I am sure that it’s no mistake that it’s also Margarita Day. Welcome to my scandalous life. This is actually my Goddess Year so I celebrate being single daily.
However, the best way to kick off Celebrate Being Single Week is with Twanna Hines, one of New York City’s smartest and most beautiful deliberately single women. Twanna Hines is a brilliant sex and relationships writer and sociologist who runs the super successful Funky Brown Chick blog. Most importantly Twanna Hines is one of my personal ride or die chicks, one of my partners in the beautiful, dirty, rich business of living and dating in New York City. We first met when she interviewed me a couple of years ago about my novel Dare and feminist erotica film Afrodite Superstar. Yup, Twanna Hines is my road dawg. Lock up your sons.
We shot these video episodes some time ago – Twanna and I set off on a Single Goddess Adventure in New York City. It was a cold early spring day and we had one question in mind: Where are the men? Well — where are the good men? We also played with some lessons in pick up lines. Uh, huh.
Alas, some things about this two-part AbiolaTV series below are regrettable – my too-long old Planet Abiola Show opening, not wearing a hat, and yes, I took some flack for saying that a guy was too nice, but as I’ve shared in the past I had a bad boy addiction that I’ve been fortunate enough to break. Oh come on — aren’t we calling everything addictions now? Pass me my addiction pass.
Random sex writer trivia, the pickup line that I use in Part 2 is also my entry in the book Six Word Memoirs on Love and Heartbreak edited by Larry Smith, an anthology that also features a mini memoir by Ms. Twanna Hines. Let Nightline and everyone else bemoan the “plight” of single black women. Sometimes girls just want to have fun. And Jon Mayer’s pathetic racist penis thankfully has nothing to do with it.
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Planet Abiola Fan Viewer Video Spotlight! Monica AKA MoBabe10
Planet Abiola Viewer Spotlight!
Congrats to all of our recent contest and giveaway winners of Purple Lab Huge Lips, Skinny Hips Lip Gloss; Sade’s ENTIRE Catalog and Queen Latifah’s Hip Hop Project DVD directed by Chris Kazi Rolle. One viewer video stands out and we wanted to share it. We love our Rockstars and our Planet Abiola All Stars.
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Congrats Monica!! And for the record you are absolutely prefect and beautiful without the lip gloss but we’re glad that you won. xoxo
Kiss and Tell Live March Event – NYC Erotica Revue and Reading Series
Abiola’s Kiss and Tell Live Erotica Revue for February was a victim of the snowstorm, so we’ve rescheduled for March 16, 2010 with our incredibly fun, sexy lineup telling bold and bawdy stories with live performances.
NEXT SHOW: Tuesday March 16th
7-10 PM, FREE, MADAME X, NYC
94 West Houston Street
March Goddess Honoree: Deborah Gregory, author and creator of The Cheetah Girls
March Line-Up: (no specific order) Twanna Hines the Funky Brown Chick, filmmaker Therese Shechter of Trixie Films, Modern Courtesan Yolanda Shoshana, comic David Lester, Boy Butter creator Eyal Feldman, Lesbian Activist and Writer Renair Amin, Danielle Henderson of Knotty Yarn, singing duo Sabrina and Giorgio, Katie AKA Lost Plum, Mia “On Top” Martina, erotic podcaster and erotica writer and new media producer Polly Frost.
March Line-Up: (no specific order) Twanna Hines the Funky Brown Chick, filmmaker Therese Shechter of Trixie Films, Modern Courtesan Yolanda Shoshana, comic David Lester, Boy Butter creator Eyal Feldman, Lesbian Activist and Writer Renair Amin, Danielle Henderson of Knotty Yarn, singing duo Sabrina and Giorgio, Katie AKA Lost Plum, Mia “On Top” Martina, erotic podcaster and erotica writer and new media producer Polly Frost.
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Mitt Romney and LMFAO’s Sky Blu in Airplane Altercation
Mitt Romney’s altercation on an airplane turned out to be with none other than our boy Sky Blu from LMFAO. That’s his uncle Red Foo from LMFAO pictured above. We love both LMFAO members and are pretty sure that Mitt Romney provoked the whole thing. Clearly he’s an old man thug who goes from airplane to airplane starting trouble by purposely asking rappers to pull their chairs up!! We wonder if the flight was headed for Miami, trick?
Anyway we find the whole thing hilarious. We have no Mitt Romney former presidential candidate videos to share but check out my exclusive AbiolaTV interview with LMFAO. That’s right Sky Blu and Red Foo get the Abiola Abrams interview and I get the Party Rock- see what being a whore or not has to do with it. Watch my LMFAO interview exclusive right now or the terrorists win.
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Tiger Woods’ Apology: The Sex and Relationships Community Reacts
Tiger Woods’ apology statement and video: 25 Top sex and relationship writers and performers react
Featuring: Candida Royalle, Mr. Marcus, Stephen Elliott, Deborah Gregory, Mary B. Morrison, Terrance Dean, Rachel Kramer Bussel, Shira Tarrant, PhD, Maryann Reid, Anna David, Twanna Hines, Eyal Feldman, Jamye Waxman, Yolanda Shoshana, Demetria Lucas, Tina Tobin, Bill Cammack, Therese Shechter, Kim Hess, Mo Beasley, Mireille Miller-Young, Mike Masters, Mollena Williams, Tess Danesi, Kenya K. Stevens, Nando Rodriguez, and Abiola Abrams.
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Tiger Woods delivered a prepared apology statement this morning at 11AM from the PGA headquarters in Florida.The Sexerati – Top Sex and Relationship Authors, Scholars, Bloggers, and Performers ranging from bestselling authors like Stephen Elliott, Deborah Gregory and Terrance Dean to porn and erotica stars like Mr. Marcus and filmmaker Candida Royalle react; after the jump.
Today’s Abiola’s Kiss and Tell News.
Tiger Woods and his “transgressions” have elicited sorrow, humor, disgust and every emotion possible in the past 3 months from his supporters, fans and those who had never given Mr. Woods a second thought.
Today the Golf Superstar finally spoke about his multi-mistress cheating situation for the first time since his star crashed and burned just after Thanksgiving last November. To refresh your memory, this all came to light after an incident involving his jilted wife Elin, Tiger, a fender bender and a golf club. Seeing ABC News present the Tiger Woods apology live with a Special News Presentation featuring Robin Roberts and George Stephanopoulos caused us to ask, seriously ABC and every other “hard” news outlet? Really? Special News Presentation? Should this be covered this extensively by ABC News or is this more the beat of smut writers like, well… me?
Then Brandon Steiner, ABC’s Sports Marketing Expert,reminded me that Tiger Woods is not a mere dude caught with his dingaling in the waitress jar, but a billion dollar business supporting several smaller business communities. Like Jay-Z said, he’s not a business man, he’s a business, man. That being said, Tiger Woods has his community and I have mine; those who make a living in the areas of sexuality and relationships.
I checked in with my wonderfully outspoken community to get their responses to the Tiger Woods sex scandal and mistress-gate, his wife Elin Nordegren Woods and Tiger Woods’ apology statement. What do the top players who make love, sex and intimate relations their business think of Tiger Woods– if they think of him at all? The range of responses from these New York Times bestselling authors, popular filmmakers, top bloggers, scholars and porn stars is diverse, fun food for thought, compelling and for me at least include the definitive statements on the Tiger Woods adultery drama.
Here’s what the smartest and most notorious Sex and Relationship Writers, Scholars and Performers have to say about Tiger Woods’ apology statement and his numerous affairs:
THE SEXERATI TALKS TIGER WOODS: SEX AND RELATIONSHIPS COMMUNITY REACTS
“I think what we need to get clear about is that Tiger Woods’ extensive, and ultimately destructive infidelity has less to do with so called “sex addiction” than it does with the long held attitude of entitlement that has permeated our culture for time immemorial. Men of success and privilege have always considered it their right to take mistresses and have affairs while their good wives stay home with the children and look the other way. The only difference now is that women are no longer willing to play along.”
Candida Royalle
Author, Entrepreneur & Erotic Filmmaker
candidaroyalle.com
“Tiger’s apology is business as usual, I think his robotic monotone delivery is appropriate for the rubbernecking masses. Nothing to see here we haven’t seen before. I think it’s some funny shit. Can’t wait to see what Saturday Night live does with it. It looks like a SNL skit.”
Mr. Marcus
Adult Performer
mrmarcus.com
“I don’t really understand what he’s apologizing for. Maybe he’s apologizing to his sponsors. Lots of people have affairs.”
Stephen Elliott
Bestselling Author, The Adderall Diaries
stephenelliott.com
“Every addict is remorseful when they’re caught red-handed in the cookie jar of their addiction–but don’t be fooled. Unless they’re rehabilitated–extensively–they always go back to their addiction of choice. And in Tiger’s case, that’s sniffing panties other than his wife’s! He needs extensive therapy and to belong to a group like Sex and Love Anonymous. That’s right–man up! Celebrities have been doing that for years–think I’m kidding? Go to any AA or NA meeting and you’ll be treated to a buffet of who’s who in every arena. Addiction doesn’t discriminate–it crosses racial, economic and gender lines at the drop of a used condom–which is every milisecond in America! Get thee to a SA meeting, Mr. Tiger!”
Deborah Gregory
Bestselling Author, CATWALK and The Cheetah Girls
cheetahrama.com
“He who is without sin, cast the first stone. Better yet, get a life of your OWN. I’m sick & tired of all these sinners judging him. Judge yourself. As it says in Single Husbands by HoneyB, ‘You can’t break what you didn’t take.’ Most married people don’t know their wedding vows.”
Mary B. Morrison
Bestselling Author
marymorrison.com
“Tiger’s apology has come too little too late. His fans, and those who support him have waited
nearly three months for him to speak of his transgressions. Although he may have been working
things out with his wife, and his immediate family, he forgot those of us who have helped him get
to where he is. We’ve tuned in to watch him play. We’ve cheered and rallied for him as he rose to become one of sport’s biggest figures. Now, as he begs for forgiveness, as only I am certain his ill-mannered handlers, and multi-million dollar sponsors, who’ve urged him to speak publicly and ask for forgiveness, unfortunately Tiger’s pleas have fallen on death ears. Even though he owes an explanation to his fans and spectators for his action, however, it’s his wife and his children, whom I truly feel sorry for, who needs to hear and see his actions of true repentance.”
Terrance Dean
Bestselling Author, “Hiding In Hip Hop”
mrterrancedean.com
“On one level, I don’t think it’s anyone’s business what Tiger Woods did or does in terms of his sex life, and the public apology seems slightly misplaced; does he truly owe the public an apology or does that belong to his family? I think it’s an exaggeration to say it cause “pain” to his fans, and maybe it’s time to question what we expect of our leaders, especially since Woods isn’t a politician. The apology appear both heartfelt as well as an media ploy to try to save his future career and popularity. However, like Bill Clinton, whose public apology his statement is being linked to, I think his sexual behavior is a sign that something was amiss in his life, as evidenced by the gap between having a yacht named Privacy and being indiscreet about his ongoing affairs.”
Rachel Kramer Bussel
Best Sex Writing series editor
rachelkramerbussel.com
“How dare Tiger Woods take up valuable airwaves with a press conference about …. Himself! Infidelity is narcissistic. Infidelity inflicts ripples of pain across families and communities. And that’s not sexy: It is abuse. Honesty and consent is what’s hot. So be a slut and have a good time. But be an ethical slut. And Tiger? Shush.”
Shira Tarrant, PhD
Author and Professor
shiratarrant.com
“Some silly woman out there really hoped her husband was listening to Tiger’s apology, but this just showed men how to do it a lot better. Tiger’s apology was written by a woman and he sounded like one. Tiger, man up and show more independence.”
Maryann Reid
Bestselling Author and Editor
alphanista.com
“I think his apology was as effective as any mea culpa could be. It had all the proper elements — the humility, the emphasis on how he’s made mistakes and has to change, the talk of spirituality. But any media watcher or cynic — if they’re not the same thing — knows that he had several months to work out what he was going to say and that people don’t change just because they say they’re going to. As I know from having gotten sober over 9 years ago, change requires constant vigilance and really a lifelong dedication to not following your natural impulses. This is a lot easier to do if you’re not being fawned over by fans and surrounded by people on the payroll who benefit out of turning a blind eye to your indiscretions.”
Anna David
Novelist and Media Personality
annadavid.com
“If PERSON A cheats on PERSON B with PERSON C, it’s really no one’s business except the parties involved. Tiger is neither my father, lover, husband nor an acquaintance. Right now, I wouldn’t necessarily want to be in Elin Nordegren’s shoes. That said, I’m uninterested in her & her husbands’ personal affairs. In fact, I think the fascination with love lives of the rich & famous says more about our country’s penchant for gawking than it does about our spry young Tiger’s alleged ability to wear women out.”
Twanna A Hines,
Sex, Dating and Relationships Writer
funkybrownchick.com
“All of this just goes to show you that you can’t tame a Tiger. Have we learned nothing from Siegfried and Roy?”
Eyal Feldman
Boy Butter Personal Lubricant Inventor, Entrepreneur
boybutter.com
“Elin, I hope this works out for you. I think this Tiger will remain restless, after all you can’t remove a cheetah’s spots, but when Tiger garners more stripes, they may be called warts, and no matter how many times you remove them, they still can grow back. And they can grow in you too, so be careful about letting him inside of you without protection Elin. Seriously.”
Jamye Waxman, M.Ed.
Sex Education for Generation X and Y
jamyewaxman.com
“While the whole Tiger Woods scandal has been entertaining as hell, it is not about sex but about love. Woods does not love himself,so how can we truly love someone else? Hopefully he is on the road to finding love of self.”
Yolanda Shoshana
Luscious Lifestyle Diva
lusciouslifestylediva.com
“I’m disappointed that Tiger Woods apologized publicly for his rampant infidelities. He doesn’t owe his fans anything other than to show up with his A-game on the green. Now what he owes his wife? That’s another story.”
Demetria Lucas
Author
abelleInbrooklyn.com
“My biggest reaction was to the delivery of the statement. If you want to sound sincere you can’t sound like you’re reading a statement you’ve been forced to read.”
Tina Tobin
Advice Maven
LuvemOrLeavem.com
“According to the written speech, he’s deeply sorry for his selfish and irresponsible behavior. He’s not as good at reading as he is at golf. He did better than Chris Brown did, at least. Good Luck to him.. Had he not been married, none of this would have happened and he wouldn’t be considered a sex addict. Period.”
Bill Cammack
Dating Genius
billcammack.com
“I care so little about Tiger Woods and his sex life, this is the most I’ve written on it ever. There are so many others doing a fine job of unpacking his love life, that I can happily focus on other things. I just don’t care about consenting adults doing what they want to do. The fact that a rich celebrity superstar had sex with someone other than his wife is the most banal thing I can imagine. It’s constant…with only the names changing from week to week. I did crack up when I saw his ‘gangsta’ Vanity Fair cover.”
Therese Shechter
Filmmaker and Writer
theamericanvirgin.blogspot.com
“Tiger Woods has no reason to apologize to anyone but Elin…no one was harmed by him sleeping with a bazillion women but wifey. Shame on Tiger’s PR team for making him do it. Until the world has an agreement with Tiger that he won’t sleep with anyone but them, no public apology needed.”
Kim Hess
Divorce Guru
kimhess.com
“Tiger Woods’ sex life is NONE OF OUR BUSINESS! Let that man, his wife, and his family work out their PERSONAL problems, in private. A public persona does not give the public the right to invade anyone’s privacy. It ain’t my busy. It ain’t yours! Anytime spent on the Tiger Woods “scandal” is time taken from our own lives and families. There’s no upside to such preoccupation. He’s a role model athletic excellence. That’s it!”
Mo Beasley
Performance Artist, Author, Educator
www.mobeasley.com
“What is most shocking to people is not that a man, a ridiculously rich celebrity, cheated on his wife, it’s that he had at least 13 mistresses! Two of these women were porn actresses, one of whom, Joslyn James, claims to have had a 3 year love affair with Tiger and two pregnancies. Directly after the Tiger Woods press conference, she and lawyer Gloria Allred pointed out that Tiger”s apology–to wife, friends, family, business partners, and fans–was incomplete. What about the women he used and threw to the curb? Tiger demanded that James give up her career in adult entertainment because he couldn’t stand the thought of her with another man. He pursued this woman, manipulated her to give up her independent income to be solely his for three years, promising her all kinds of things, including his love. Many on the blogs are making out that this porn star, Allred, and the other women are the real exploiters. I disagree. Tiger’s privilege as an elite male allows him a legitimacy that these women do not have. As sex workers and mistresses they are cast as deviants, while he just made some bad mistakes. He is able to use the proper womanhood of his married wife to further stigmatize the women he cheated with (Elin is a victim and these women were just asking for trouble), and to hide behind some ridiculous claim that he is sick–with a sex addiction–and therefore is a victim of his own behavior as well. We should all feel sorry. I don’t. “
Mireille Miller-Young
Professor of Feminist Studies
femst.ucsb.edu/miller-young.html
“Tiger’s a Tool. I was working in the other room as I heard Tiger’s apology today, but that didn’t stop me from yelling at the TV, “You Freakin’ wussy…” and “Oh… let’s see how long that lasts!”
What are Tiger’s tears for? I believe for the loss of career, family, and sheer humiliation, but I don’t believe he is repentant in his soul. Tiger is a child that doesn’t have enough of an identity to do the right thing for his own sake, rather than do the right thing for others. That is why, he is doomed to repeat this, wait and see.”
Mike Masters
Master Dater
mikethemasterdater.com
“I think the kinky among us are more bemused at the Tiger Woods situation than shocked. There is so much flexibility in how we live our lives sexually that the “Average Pervert’s” first thought is “Well, why didn’t he just negotiate a more open relationship?” Many people live poly(amorous) lifestyles… more than you might think. As a viable option, that could have have made this situation a moot point.”
Mollena Williams
Ms. San Francisco Leather 2009 and The Perverted Negresss
mollena.com
“The Tiger Woods issue seems to be an extremely high profile example of how monogamy might not be the best construct for everyone. Adding huge sums of money, extensive time spent travelling and a large dose of “hero” worship just made it more likely that Tiger would succumb to what so many married people before him done. I don’t think this makes him a sex addict but simply a flawed human like most of us. Plus his personal life is no more my business than mine is his.”
Tess Danesi
Sex Writer
NYC-urban-gypsy.blogspot.com
“Tiger Woods is not the bad guy here. It’s the modern relationship that’s being exposed.”
Kenya K. Stevens
Love Coach and Author
jujumama.net
“So this is what getting caught red-handed looks like: a clunky speech, in a bad suit, with words of “I’m sorry and I’ve disappointed you.” You stopped living by the core values you were taught and convinced yourself that normal rules didn’t apply. Child, you’re a horny man and your apology is a little too late–but I did love the little sniffle you gave us at the end–nice touch. And Tiger, never say, “Never,” didn’t you learn anything from King Henry VIII ?”
Nando Rodriguez
Sex and Dating Blogger
nandoism.com
“I never gave Tiger Woods a second thought before any of this and probably won’t ever again once it all washes over. From personal experience and my own family background I can tell you that the most loving, supportive and beautiful people cheat and have affairs outside of their marriages. However, Tiger Woods, from all accounts, was neither loving, supportive or beautiful. I don’t know Tiger Woods, his wife Elin or anyone directly related to this sex scandal but perhaps we are so fascinated as a country only as a diversion from our own issues. The only thing that astounds me as these stories break and as a sex and relationships celebrity columnist who has the dubious pleasure of reporting them, is that we continue to be surprised. Perhaps instead we should reevaluate our definitions of the exclusive club of marriage.”
Abiola Abrams
Love Journalist: Writer, Media Personality, Art Filmmaker
abiolatv.com
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Porn and Perversion for Profit
Anti Porn Ranter from 1965 gets his kicks… Today I’m sure he’d be outed in some kind of sex scandal.
Sophia Kokosalaki for Deisel Denim – Sexy Grunge for Fall 2010
Diesel Denim and designer Sophia Kokosalaki.
One thing we really hope that does not come back is grunge inspired fashion. Perhaps this is why we’re simultaneously scared and titilated by these images from Diesel and Sophia Kokosalakiat Fashion Week. We love the images at the top and the next one…
And then just like that it all falls apart and looks like our girl Jessica Simpson when she’s between breakups with John Mayer and the football cutie. Not our favorite Jess.
Bleeeechhhhh! Thumbs up on the sleek and sexy side of this new Diesel Black and Gold line, though. They must love it in Nawlins…
Photo Credit: JuJu Rhee, ICED Media
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Who Pays On Dates?
Who should pay on dates? Men? Women? Are the rules different for first dates? Do you go dutch? Does the man always pay? Watch! — And as a bonus I reveal my Ms. February shot in the New York Sex Blogger Calendar! The calendar benefits sex work awareness.
Abiola’s Who Pays On Dates Kiss and Tell episode is part of the LuvEm Or Leave Em Advice Team of dating, sex, and relationship bloggers and vloggers.
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