Dating Challenges for Single Moms: How to Still Feel the Love! (VIDEO)


February 24, 2012 • Advice, Guest Contributor, Hot Topics, Relationships, single women, The Goddess Year, Video • Views: 663

Single Mothers and Dating Challenges

Hello Single Moms!

Do you get tired of people asking you “Why are you single?” Many times people look at you as if YOU are the reason. You have a child and for one reason or another daddy didn’t want to stick around so there just has to be a problem.

I personally get offended when someone assumes because I’m not married; there must be something wrong with me. I had the pleasure to appear on local news station this morning where there was a mini debate on whether my city Atlanta is one of the best cities to date in. I was selected as the one who opposed that it is the best city and I was able to share a few reasons why.

In this post I’d like to share some of the reasons many single mothers and single women in general may be having a tough time dating, not just in the ATL area, but all around the world. I also have a few tips on what you can do to keep yourself from feeling inadequate or unloved by bringing joy to yourself.

It shouldn’t come as a shock that dating has become almost like a full time job and it’s seems like you’re having to work extra hard just to get and keep a man’s interest these days. Many times it’s not because there is something wrong with you, but in my humble opinion; I’m running into more and more guys who guys these days who just don’t want to settle down right now. I’ve come across at least three guys recently who all made it very clear they aren’t ready to commit or settle down. This to me is quite alright; I mean I can appreciate their honesty.

What I can’t appreciate and I’m sure many single ladies can agree is the fact that while none of the men want to commit, they have no problem asking to come over and “chill at our crib” we all know what that means. This is one of the top reasons why I’m still single and why many single women are too I’m sure you can agree.

Other Reasons I’m Still Single:

• Guys want the benefits but no commitment;

• He says he’s single but he really isn’t single so therefore he’s not truly available;

• There is a very wide distance between the ratio of women to men, I’m talking 15 to 1;

• Men no longer want to date anymore, they just want to cut right to the chase;

I have also included a few ways that you as a single mom can embrace being single without feelings of inadequacy. Yes you’re single and yes you’re not married and yes you have a child or children and no father for the kids, but life is not over for you. You must find ways to make yourself happy and not sit around hoping someone will show up with a dozen roses and shower you with love. If it hasn’t happened yet chances are you may have to wait a while longer.

How to Rock Your Single Life:

• Treat yourself and your children/ child out to a special day together. Maybe have some ice-cream and check out a movie together.

• Don’t wait for some guy to do it, pamper yourself. Even if it’s just a simple manicure and pedicure with a sexy new color choice. You’ll be amazed at how something so simple can make you feel foxy!

• Exercise and keep your mind off the worry of being alone. This relaxes you, stimulates your mind and also helps keeps you in good shape. If you feel good about yourself then you tend to treat others better so being single is not like this big deal!

• Don’t spend every minute looking for a possible “boyfriend” just enjoy your life right now at this very moment. It works for me!

I hope you have enjoyed today’s post and video. Remember that you are beautiful, sexy, vibrant and intelligent so get up, look in the mirror and dance!!!



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12 Responses to Dating Challenges for Single Moms: How to Still Feel the Love! (VIDEO)

  1. Anon says:

    I just adore you Abiola. Thanks so much for bringing the Single Mom lady on – she’s great too. Nice advice Tinzley.

  2. Sheila says:

    I hate Atlanta.

  3. Krissy says:

    Great post! We need more sweetness in our lives.

  4. Nicolette says:

    Your kids are lucky – a happy mom is a good mom.

  5. Thanks Nicolette, It can be tough at times because we are both human I’m mom and she’s daughter, but you’re right it does create balance which keeps the joy coming in for me.

  6. Hey Krissy, yes we do! I believe in self therapy and doing all possible to stay happy because it’s no one else s job to make you happy. It starts with us! Thanks for your comment!

  7. You do Sheila? Well I can’t argue with that as you have your own views. I hate the traffic here! Thanks for stopping by!

  8. Awww aren’t you a dear Anon, I adore Abiola too she’s the best. I’m happy to see you’re digging me too. I hope my message can help  give more insight to some folks out there. Thanks for stopping by!

  9. Tinzley is a great woman — I bet you are too. Thanks for tuning in. xoxo

  10. Well said, Krissy. xoxo

  11. Thank you — wait until you see what we have coming up. It’s going to be a gerat year!