Has your husband’s behavior changed? Is he no longer the loving, doting partner you have always known him to be? This informative article is not a substitute for mental health attention if needed. Thanks to Charlie Hodgson for this great advice post. Thoughtful video tips below from Coach Michael Taylor.
A midlife crisis or transition is very real and can hit a man between the ages of 37 and the 50s and can present itself in different ways. Most men who experience male menopause or andropause are closer to age 50, however. It can be a confusing and worrying time for his loved ones if the symptoms are not fully understood and there is a tendency to ignore or dismiss them as ‘”just a phase.” (In contrast, a quarterlife crisis hits in the 20s.)
Those dealing with a midlife crisis are terrified that growing up means growing old– although it doesn’t! An alternative to having a negative midlife crisis is having a positive time of growth and evolution. You can still be youthful and adventurous without the immaturity factor at age 100 and beyond. Having wisdom combined with the feeling of youth can make this a time of fun, healthy exploration.
To help make sense of these changes if they present themselves as depression or acting out in other harmful ways, here’s a list of possible warning signs:
He says his life is boring.
A man experiencing midlife crisis may become restless, seeking new adventures or excitement in his life. The feeling that his dreams have not been fulfilled is a typical sign and he will spend his spare time seeking to achieve new goals. Your committed and loving husband who was once happy and content to be with his family could be spending more and more time with new friends who he feels are far less boring.
His personal appearance has changed.
An urge to drastically change the way he looks is typical in an attempt to look younger and more attractive. A new hair style for example or a new wardrobe is both evidence of this and should be taken seriously.
He is “partying” too much.
The signs are obvious. He’s hanging out all hours of the night. His friends are suddenly all younger than he is. He suddenly takes up drinking or drugging as a sport. His behavior may even become erratic or volatile and shouldn’t be ignored.
He is displaying signs of depression.
Becoming withdrawn and disinterested in his surroundings are classic signs that a man is depressed. It is common for a male to not recognize that he is becoming depressed and will dismiss it as “nothing”. This of course is far from true and he should be encouraged to seek help.
He has a wondering eye.
One of the most painful results of a midlife crisis is that your husband may be showing excessive interest in the opposite sex. He may be rekindling old friendships or reminiscing about an old flame. This pathological hound dog behavior even may present itself as sex addiction. He is trying to compensate for his perceive inadequacies.
In more extreme cases he might become secretive with his mobile phone or spending unexplained periods of time away from the family home. This should be investigated as it very likely that it will result in a breakdown of the marriage if remained unchecked. Get counseling if needed.
Another alternative? The real deal.
The experience I have gained at my private investigation agency has taught me and my team that “midlife crisis” is a crucial and often dangerous time in a marriage and using our expertise we have helped many people unravel some of the mysteries surrounding it. Using the best technology we have available along with the knowledge we have obtained, we are proud to have helped countless women take control of their lives.